I’ve written things I’m proud of. I’ve had people pay me to think, to speak, to build. On paper, I’m doing alright.
And yet, after every small success, my brain runs a familiar program:
“It was a fluke. They’ll figure you out soon.”
This is imposter syndrome, but not the shiny, confidence-in-a-blender version we see on LinkedIn. It’s quieter than that. Less dramatic, more consistent. Like background noise you forget is playing until someone turns it off.
When "Good Enough" Never Feels True
Imposter syndrome isn’t always loud. Sometimes it shows up as over-preparing, obsessing over details no one will notice, or discounting praise like it’s too heavy to hold.
A few months ago, someone said, “I love how clearly you think.” I nodded and smiled. But what I really thought was: If only you knew how messy it actually is up there.
It’s not false modesty. It’s the deep, internal belief that I’m tricking people. That I’ve just been lucky. That if I stop trying so hard, it’ll all fall apart.
The Psychology Behind It
There are dozens of articles about imposter syndrome, most of them giving you tidy advice: “Own your accomplishments!” or “Keep a win journal!”
I’ve tried those. They help, kind of. But they don’t erase the deeper thing—this sense that your success isn’t part of you, just something that happened to you.
Psychologists call it cognitive dissonance: a mismatch between your internal self-perception and your external reality. You believe you're inadequate, so success feels like someone else's clothes—borrowed, not earned.
Where It Starts
For me, it goes back to school. I was the “smart kid” who didn’t always feel smart. Praise made me nervous. Expectations made me freeze. I learned that achievement got approval, so I kept chasing it—but it never felt like enough.
Imposter syndrome isn’t about low self-esteem, necessarily. It’s about conditional self-worth. You believe you’re only as good as your last win.
So What Do You Do?
I’m not going to give you a bullet-point list. You’ve seen enough of those. I’ll just say what’s working for me, slowly:
- I remind myself that competence doesn’t always feel like confidence. Just because I’m anxious doesn’t mean I’m unqualified.
- I let myself be average sometimes. Not everything has to prove something.
- I talk about it—out loud, with friends. Turns out, a lot of high-achievers feel this way. We just don’t say it out loud because, well… imposter syndrome.
- And I practice one radical idea: Maybe I’m not tricking anyone. Maybe I’m just... capable.
The Truth You Don’t Want to Hear (But Need To)
If you struggle with imposter syndrome, it probably means you’re not the fraud you think you are. Fraudulent people don’t sit around worrying about how legitimate they are.
You’re not successful despite who you are. You’re successful because of who you are—even if your inner critic hasn’t updated its résumé in years.
And the next time you feel like you’ve fooled everyone?
Just remember: real imposters don’t care.
